COFFEE (n) The person upon whom one coughs.
FLABBERGASTED (adj) Appalled over how much weight you have gained.
ABDICATE (v) To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
ESPLANADE (v) To attempt an explanation while drunk.
NEGLIGENT (adj) Describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.
LYMPH (v) Walk with a lisp.
GARGOYLE (n) Olive-flavoured mouthwash.
FLATULENCE (n) Emergency vehicle that picks you up after you’re run over by a steamroller.
BALDERDASH (n) A rapidly receding hairline.
TESTICLE (n) A humorous question in an exam.
RECTITUDE (n) The formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
